Adopting wife's last name

"In America today, many men tend to have the same hang-up about surrendering their last names, says Brian Powell, a professor of family and gender at Indiana University Bloomington who has studied attitudes toward marital name changes: They worry they’ll be seen as less of a man. And it seems they’re probably right. In a forthcoming study, Kristin Kelley, a doctoral student working with Powell, presented people with a series of hypothetical couples that had made different choices about their last name, and gauged the subjects’ reactions. She found that a woman’s keeping her last name or choosing to hyphenate changes how others view her relationship. “It increases the likelihood that others will think of the man as less dominant—as weaker in the household,” Powell says. “With any nontraditional name choice, the man’s status went down.” The social stigma a man would experience for changing his own last name at marriage, Powell told me, would likely be even greater."     Hot Air

Just a gentle reminder Deebs

“The easiest work in the world is to find fault.” 

Spurgeon

The comment Internet Monk decided they wouldn't allow to be posted.

Mike Bell, I think the word “ally” has proven problematic to me because I tend to associate it with giving approval to who the person is or what they are doing.  On the other hand, I’ve often felt a great deal of compassion for people who have found themselves in a destructive lifestyle, such as alcoholism, finding it very difficult to get out.  So I’m not an “ally” of alcoholism but I certainly can feel compassion for those people who appear to be almost born into it.

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R.S. Mccain posted a sad/painful story of a young lady and her attempts to make life work for her by denying her own femininity and gender..

http://theothermccain.com/2018/07/11/queer-feminist-update/

She has self described  as “queer” and “nonbinary” and used “they/them” pronouns.  She further self described as a “a sexy pink genderless fat orb.”   Now, she has decided that instead of hating men, she will become one herself - she now wants to “transition.”

McCain says she is “severely mentally ill.”

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I don’t want to call her mentally ill but, she’s headed down a road that will only continue and deeper her emotional and psychological pain.

If I was a work colleague, I would treat her very well; indeed I would go out of my way to be kind to her.  I have done that with others over the years - because I look down the road they are on and recognize the pain to come if they do not change courses; and changing course is not easy for people like this young girl.

Mike, I’m not sure how you would use “ally” in this very real scenario but if she asked me, I would tell her, out of compassion, that the direction she is choosing is only going to bring her great pain.  Is her lifestyle a threat to mine? Not at all. Do I have any reason to hate or despise her? Not at all.

I look at her as a lost soul very vulnerable to the latest cultural fads.  I’m pretty sure she has only the vaguest idea that there is a God and that she was created “imago dei” but is turning her back upon whom He created her to be.  There will continue to be no hope for her to ever experience peace or joy with her current choices.

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So I’m not sure about being an “ally” but I am sure she desperately needs wiser friends than the ones she has if they are encouraging her down her current path.

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God help her.